Me: How do you find Will Smith in the snow?
Mum: He's black
Me: You look for fresh prints, but oh my God
rippedjeanslaugh: killa-cam: How teens and adults text: Expectations: Teens - wut es up! wut r u doing 2day? want 2 go & do sum stuff Adults - What are you doing today? Want to hang out? Reality: Teens - Hey! What you doing today? Want to hang out? Adults - wut es up! wut r u doing 2day? want 2 go & do sum stuff Omg this is my mom Haha my dad
animalsbeingdicks: Some lost footage of the 1992 Rodney King riots. Even the dogs got into it.
lizdexia: 53 Questions That You May Not Have Seen Before funnythinghappened: 1: What do you put on hotdogs? 2: Do you say “anticlimatic” or “anticlimactic”? 3: Do you check flyers before grocery shopping? 4: Blue, black, or some other colour pen ink? 5: Do you use your parking brake? 6: Look to your left. How many framed pictures are on the wall? 7: Do you know how to play chess? 8: How...
Imagine in 20 years when your son comes from...
Son: Mum, I got detention.
Me: OMG, what did you do?
Son: I hit a kid.
Me: Well you know that will cost you a month without internet.
Son: But that kid said Harry Potter sucks.
Me: COME IN HERE MY BOY, YOU MADE ME SO PROUD. I KNOW I'VE RAISED YOU WELL HEDWIG CROOKSHANKS.
poesys: i find it pretty fucking inconsiderate that my grandchildren haven’t used time travel to visit me. and frankly, i’m a bit offended. AM I NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU GRANDCHILDREN? WELL FUCK YOU MAYBE I WON’T EVEN HAVE KIDS AND YOU WON’T EXIST HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THAT
A guy in my psychology class said he thought...
Me: Okay so if orientation is a choice, choose to be gay, right now.
Me: Why not?
Him: Because I don't find men attractive
Me: So CHOOSE to find them attractive
Him: ....... I can't.
Me: Sorry, WHAT was that? You CAN'T????
11 Facts From 2011
think-progress: 1. The CIA is monitoring up to 5 million tweets per day. 2. Income inequality in America is worse than in Ancient Rome. 3. Twenty-three straight polls find Americans overwhelmingly want to raise taxes to pay down debt. 4. 68% of millionaires support raising taxes on millionaires. 5. Wall Street’s recession cost 1.5 million times more than securing Occupy Wall Street...